If it weren't for you telling me how my typed words affect you, or to "keep on writing," then I would quickly grow tired and bored of flinging my virtual self out and onto this superhighway.
Fortunately, a lot of the time, I do find myself in "real life" talking with others about ideas that I espouse upon on this here screen. Other times, you and I have quick interactions at the end of my blogposts that let me know you're out here. Then, there are the moments that transpire in personal time and space that are just too delectable to be quickly tossed off with a flip of the page, or a pressing of a button. Moments ago, I experienced one of those. I hope you will receive my sharing it with others positively and as a model for our collective learning lessons...
(A letter just pulled from my email inbox):
"It’s only a matter of time before things will start to get really bad. I’m already an addict, a convict, and a jerk, and it does not feel good. A Felony Offense and stealing from liquor stores is next.
The Earth needs us - it screams for our engagement and, thus, I must serve it.
If I'm not going to serve it then who will?
.......I don’t know anything."
(And, my letter in response):
Dearest Beloved,
Thank you for your typed words. Please know that I do not know anything, either. However, my BodyMind has always told me that it is precisely this thought that is one of the most secure launching platforms for diving deeper into awareness and consciousness.
I don't know
I don't know
I don't know
anything.
It is my belief that we can not serve the land, let alone others, until we can first serve ourselves.
This is very hard terrain and, personally, I am uncomfortably navigating its bumpy path myself.
Yes, in the past, you and I have both behaved inappropriately.
Yes, in the past, we have made poor decisions
as well as bad choices, and these have led to some very harsh consequences.
And, yes, in the future, we are going to again make mistakes and trespass against others.
Nonetheless, behavior does not make the person.
We steal, we lie, we act like jerks, we cry, we scream, we shout, we make love, we wince, we honor, we help, we rejoice ~ All One,
all minute eco-systems comprising a spiraling, shifting continuum.
We are not as we do.
We are simply human beings experiencing
a journey.
If we can recognize this, then we can begin to see how
choice plays an active & integral role in our lives.
How will we choose to cultivate this Garden of Eden that we all dream of?
First of all, what is it that we want to grow in this garden?
As a woman, I identify with David Deida's idea
that the Divine Creative Feminine seeks LOVE as its guiding force.
Yes, I desire to reap LOVE - love for others, love for Earth, love for Self, lovelovelove.
In order to do this, however, I must then SOW LOVE first.
So, how do I do this?
With each breath, how can I love? With each thought? With each moment?
I don't know.
Today, when my internal alarm clock went off at 5am and I was
awoken from a dream in which my repressed emotion was rearing its ugly, violent head,
I recognized the immediate hypocrisy and blatant contradiction.
"Who am I to sit in meditation, to chant and offer prayer when I am this imperfect,
angry human?" is how a deeply-embedded cellular impulse wanted to respond.
(Actually, who am I not to?)
And, somehow, even though sitting through the 108 chants of calling in the Divine Wisdom of
the Masculine to help balance and center me was difficult and I still wasn't quite present throughout the entire time period,
I smiled.
I allowed and offered for a soft, gentle tilt of my face in an upwards direction.
"This is it!" my Soul Spirit sang
as it celebrated and vibrated!
You are Perfect as You Are, My Dear Beloved.
You are Lovable and Beautiful and Strong and Completely Imperfect -
which makes you YOU.
The World Needs You.
We Need You.
Lovelovelove
US !
Love You First,
Love You,
Love love love.
Yes, we can.
