Sure, maybee we still desire to pull the wool over our own eyes, to plead self-determinism and free will and to think that it's all just chaos without meaning.
Okay.
Go for it.
And, let me know how that line of thinking adds to your overall contentment in life.
Because, sure, we might not know why we are here or for what our purpose is, or why we choose to love in some moments and why, most of the time, we don't. Yet, we do know how we feel - as we drag ourselves up out of bed to face another sunrise, another day of the weekly grind, more defacto moments that can not be denied - no matter how hard we try to avoid, elude or pretend otherwise.
There's nothing random about it - about the bed you're in, the life you're living and the path you've followed to this here and now. There are, however, impulses that you've been pursuing - a scented trail that either excites you with its pungent aromas of adventure or that dulls your laconic fears with its lack of a risky musk. For a long time, I followed the path of my tears - erroneously embodying that I had to hurt to heal and that my hard-headed ways would only bee cured by years of beating myself against the same invisible door. And, thank you teacher - that winding road has come to a sharp left turn and I am out of there/here.
Yet, waking up is an ongoing process. Perhaps, some of us were born to sleep so that others could awake? It's all a dream anyways so, why bother, right? If it's a dream, then what do you dream? If it's a nightmare, then have you explored lucid dreaming? The possibilities are ongoing - follow your heart's song. It knows - it has always known. Ever since you first came from Source, it knew. Tap back in. Feel. Sit in silence. Let the answers bubble up, from the mystery. The way of forcing an outcome is over.
Unlike Facebook and all of our social media is teaching us, we are not born to be celebrities, basking in the stink of fame and wealth. We are born to live in harmony and to bloom in a loving environment - after all, our human biology demands it. We are innately designed to need meaningful touch and contact with our world, ourselves and each other. It's simply our minds that convince us otherwise and keeps us separate from those around us - believing that we're special and that the future we're chasing will come, so long as we suffer through this now long enough. Only, when it comes, we've become so desensitized that we don't have the ability to enjoy it or the intuition to know that "THIS IS IT." Stop running. Sit up. Breathe in. Bow down and exclaim your gratitude. The Universe loves to receive your heart felt thanks. It responds in kind.
There's nothing random about my running into a transient man whom I met last year and with whom I share a LOVE for the non-fictional word on a Thanksgiving day on a street corner on Broadway. There's nothing random about my dancing and shimmying as he calls in our shared dreams. There's nothing random about the money I had in my wallet in those moments, about how I didn't have to break one of the bills because the coffee shop cutie blessed me with a holiday drink and how I was able to place it all in R's hands as I leaped back to my 22nd Street house. There's nothing random about his being black and homeless and my being white and privileged. There's nothing random about how we have used tools of oppression to create systems of injustice. There's nothing random about his reminding me of my purpose for being here, now - to prosper so that I may lovingly take care of my neighbors.
So, I bow down, before my burgeoning altar, waving a stick of Paolo Santo as an Owl wing beats the air in front of my face. I sit with my hurting, leftovers from the days before, as I silently ask the questions that are in my heart. A response that comes (by way of my Osho Ta'rot deck - thank you sweet sistah DK for this bday gift) speaks to MORALITY. "No matter what you do," some wise voice says to myself, "your actions do not define you, Cara. Nor do they define anyone else. Happiness is not based on what we get - it's a matter of simple being." And, I remember LOVE.
"Bodhidharma ... far transcends moralists, puritans, so-called good people, do-gooders. He has touched the very rock bottom of the problem. Unless awareness arises in you, all your morality is bogus, all your culture is simply a thin layer which can be destroyed by anybody....
"Morality has restricted all the juice and energy
of life to the narrow confines of this woman's mind. It can't flow
there, so she really has become 'a dried up old prune.' Her whole manner
is very proper and stiff and severe, and she is always ready to see
every situation as black and white, like the jewel she wears around her
neck.
The Queen of Clouds lurks in the minds of all of us who have been brought up with rigid ideas of good and bad, sinful and virtuous, acceptable and unacceptable, moral and immoral. It's important to remember that all these judgments of the mind are just products of our conditioning. And whether our judgments are applied to ourselves or to others, they keep us from experiencing the beauty and godliness that lies within. Only when we break through the cage of our conditioning and reach the truth of our own hearts can we begin to see life as it really is."
The Queen of Clouds lurks in the minds of all of us who have been brought up with rigid ideas of good and bad, sinful and virtuous, acceptable and unacceptable, moral and immoral. It's important to remember that all these judgments of the mind are just products of our conditioning. And whether our judgments are applied to ourselves or to others, they keep us from experiencing the beauty and godliness that lies within. Only when we break through the cage of our conditioning and reach the truth of our own hearts can we begin to see life as it really is."
