On Signs, Omens & Synchronicity, take II

"Swooping Hawk: Great Spirit in the Sky," Rancho Cuyamaca State Park, '05

Dreams and intuition have been a vibrant part of my life since I was a girl.  Some would say that this is part of the feminine mystique but, as my ex-boyfriend demonstrated, our intuition is less about our gender and more about our connection to the Earth under our feet.  Yesterday, I was recalling a vivid re-occurring dream that visited my subconscious as a child.  It was an epic battle that took place between myself and the ocean.  In it, I would attempt to exit a Pacific shoreline as a surging tide kept trying to suck me out to sea.  With the shore at a steep incline, I would fight, tooth and nail, to end up, spent and exhausted, upon a sandy beach.  As I grew into adulthood, I recognized that the Ocean represents the Great Mother and I realized that the energy in this dream mimicked my energetic experiences caused by the drastic mood swings of my own mother.  One day, she was my best friend and then, the very next day, she could be my worst nightmare.  True to form, I chose both best friends and boyfriends whose lack of energetic sustainability mirrored this same pattern - pulling me in only to push me away, pulling me in pushing me away, pull and push, push and pull.  It's emotionally and physically exhausting.

And, yet, I've recently been writing of Bruce Lee's philosophy to "Be like Water."  (True to form, it was because my ex was such a huge Bruce Lee fan that I perused most of Bruce's chronicles and watched most of his films.)  Intuitively, I've been drawn to approach my developing movement modality, which I call "Primal Fluidity," with this in mind.  I have also been introduced to the transformational thought program of ShaktiRising, which holds this philosophy as elemental for our emotional bodies.  "Allow our emotions to flow into our hearts and out, like the tide," is what this non-profit organization, that empowers and heals the lives of women, teaches.  I have also been fortunate to be on the receiving end of the life-affirming work of Windwalker Dorn, a third-generation Cherokee woman and Clans Mother, who travels the North American continent "Healing the Waters" within as well as the waters without and who presented this work here at the Prosperity Hive.

So, last year, when I had finally sat long enough with the intention of listening to my heart, my heart finally began to speak.  It spoke of wanting to grow love, even is it felt deep sadness over consistently growing turbulence.  If I wanted to grow love, however, I had to first examine what my ripe and mature seeds were and, then, where I was planting these seeds.  I had to look at where I was investing my time, energy and resources and with who.  As I mapped out the garden of my Soul, it led to a painful recognition that I hadn't been planting my seeds in nutritious soil.  Naturally, I hadn't been growing anything but turmoil!  By continuing to listen and learning to respond from instinct and intuition, Shakti and myself were soon united on a path that combined our mutual passions.  The Prosperity Hive was a natural unfolding of us simply listening and then responding to synchronicity.

Last week while hiking up Cowles Mountain, a friend asked me why I used the metaphor of Bees in my current life's work.  Last spring, I was angrily stung by a bee in the face as I hiked up a Poway hill in pursuit of manifesting a piece of land in order to grow our regional sustainability work.  Later that fall, while standing with Shakti outside of her then Ocean Beach bungalow, a honeybee flew right between us, reminding me of a dream from the night before that had been filled with honeybees encircling my lower calves.  During last week's hike, a group of four of us arrived on the top of a Memorial Day mountain filled with hikers and holiday revelers.  While drinking water and talking, I looked to the east and saw a black cloud of honeybees headed in our direction.  "Shit," I said.  "Get down," I commanded as I took refuge behind a rock.  Everyone followed my directions and soon the swarm had passed overhead, headed toward the creation of its next Hive.

Yes, I don't "know" what any of it means.  But I do know that we are on the brink of Great Change.  And, I'm starting to recognize the signs and omens more quickly these days.  On Sunday, Windwalker spoke of markings on our human bodies and how they are signals from our past lives.  And I don't know what any of it means.  "I'm not gonna figure this out, I'm gonna relax into it.  I'm not gonna figure this out, by using my brain instead my heart."