"Let go of your attachment to an outcome," has been the repeated, sage advice from this weekend. I can feel the truth in these words - it feels like a soothing balm, releasing the veil of separation that my ego can create between myself and others/the world. While strolling through a busy, late-night Gaslamp District on Saturday, my BodyMind was filled with unease - a tidal wave of unconscious behavior looms large. D. reminded me that it is not my job alone to attempt swimming upstream in order to reverse this current. "I know," I gently responded. Still, my desire to change our predicament is great. However, what life lessons over the past few years have taught me is that the only person I can ever change is ME.
So, this morning, while reflecting upon a very specific relationship that is teaching me greatly about surrender and giving my LOVE even in light of the judgment, rejection, denial and "taking" that has happened in the past, I wrote that I am willing to still show up if your knowing me and receiving my offering directly and positively affects the planet. Then, right in that exact moment, a sweet HoneyBee landed right upon my snake bite tattoo/marker from the Universe. I allowed her to crawl across this thin skin of mine as my body was filled with light energy and I wept. I cried for truth and LOVE and joy and all things beautiful and bright.
While walking back to my North Park abode, a pigeon pecked along the road in front of me as I stood waiting at the curb for the light to change. It hobbled around with one club foot and, chances are, it wasn't born that way. Chances are, more than likely, that its lower leg became entwined in fishing net, plastic or some other 'death trap' that we humans have unintentionally created. Chances are that its future survival, along with its fellow Earth cousins, depends on US. Chances are that if we don't shift our unconscious behaviors of lashing out and cutting, slicing, striking and bulldozing the Earth, then we may not bee here, either.
So, yeah, I am attached to an outcome. And, I'd rather sacrifice myself in the name of all that is good and right; I'd prefer to go down standing up for what I believe in then to simply cower and cave to a destructive ideology; and I am just hoping that you are too and that, together, as one collective unit, we'll build forward with this as our guiding ethos.
