It's intriguing to watch the thoughts in one's mind.
There are notions I could entertain about myself, especially in relation to the video above,
that are not gentle or loving. When I noticed these judgments arising, I told myself that if I am basing my thoughts on what I look like then I am not really seeing who I am. I know who my Soul is and it is so much more than the simple container of my human form, and even my gender. And, my intention here is to show up in the widest spectrum of my humanity so that we may all remember...
Last night, a group of eleven of us gathered to bless and christen the heart of the Gaslamp space that I am slowly moving in to working out of. It's ironic to watch the ebb and flow of this life - to have reveled in the prosperity that the Hive truly embodied and to now bee in a space one-sixth its size that currently has no lighting to illuminate it! R. and I arrived early to finagle what we could find and make use of so that we could shed some light on the evening. Then, my community came (just as they always do when I ask - wow! How blessed I am!) and we connected - with our eyes, with our words, our hearts, our dancing, through sound and music and song and laughter. We held each other and documented the process. We enjoyed simply bee-ing together. Jon said that it was like our own version of Warhol's Factory. YES!
So, even though I am at the end of my rope and I feel as though I am pulling myself, tooth and nail, back towards whole, I honor how honest this space feels - it's where we are, collectively. As I like to say, "beautiful, filled with potential and beat up." And, I am also filled with immense gratitude for the others in my life, for how we support each other as best we can and for the MAGIC we continually CO-CREATE. I am also wholeheartedly committed to returning the Divine Love that the Universe has continually, over and over again, been reaping upon me in this lifetime, now. We're married - him and I. It's a Divine Union - made manifest eons ago. He's just been waiting for me to commit.
