For Clarification Purposes
"It is wrong to think that love comes from long companionship and persevering courtship. Love is the offspring of spiritual affinity and unless that affinity is created in a moment, it will not be created for years or even generations.” --Kahlil Gibran
The prolific, Lebanese-American Kahlil Gibran penned over a dozen, esoteric novels on the subjects of love, truth and beauty in the early mid-twentieth century, including the internationally acclaimed, The Prophet. The above quote, taken from the short pages of his must-read The Prophet, requires a bit of Rumi-nation before settling into its deeper meaning. On the surface, it may appear that Gibran is advocating for a notion of "falling in love at first sight." Yet, it would be detrimental to fall into such thinking. Rather, what Gibran is referring to here is what I like to think of as 'moving from a premise of possibility.' For, all too often, we relegate ourselves to the fate of stagnant relationships as well as to hum-drum interactions that do not feed our deepest desires because we fear that there is a lack of others in this world who are willing to meet us in love.
So, we muscle through intimate relationships because we think this is what we must do. We work hard and tirelessly towards the satisfaction of another. We try and force our ideas of love upon someone whose belief system is not compatible with our own - regardless of how pure and positive our intentions are. (Yes, I am speaking from personal experience here.) And this is what, I believe, Gibran is referring to. He is saying that, unless love naturally unfolds as it is meant to - because it has been divined, long before this now - then no matter how much energy and effort one invests in the pursuit of love, it cannot be attained. No matter how deep the longing, how passionate the dream, how perfect the match, Love is ephemeral and fleeting. It is mutually agreed upon in the instant. For Love is in this moment, now.
Simultaneously, love is also timeless. It just is - with no beginning, and no end point. It simply flows. Like the river, a dam that is used to divert its natural course is highly vulnerable and requires a large amount of effort by the gregarious beaver to maintain. Let your love flow in the direction it was meant to. Be honest with yourself, and others, about how and where your love is heading while also trying to let go of any ideas of where it will end up. That's the "love at first sight" trap. Because Love does not have a specific location- only illusion does.
Know that there is an abundance of LOVE here, now. That all you dream of is simply waiting for you to commit to its manifestation. And, let go of trying so hard to make another Love you. It will never happen... Someone had to recently sting me with this bitter pill to swallow. It's painful, yes. And, it's a truth. I came across another sweet, little nugget of wisdom written on a friend's Facebook wall this morning:
"Don't "Fall in Love,"" she wrote to her friend, who was espousing upon such a notion in her early morning reverie. "Because you don't know where you are falling to. Rather, "GROW IN LOVE." This is what the Universe will respond to. Make sure that you and your partner actually do GROW together."
YES!
So, again, I ask,
"What do YOU want to GROW?"
(For more on Gibran, see here.)