“Forgiveness is not about forgetting. It is about letting go of another
person's throat......Forgiveness does not create a relationship. Unless
people speak the truth about what they have done and change their mind
and behavior, a relationship of trust is not possible. When you forgive
someone you certainly release them from judgment, but without true
change, no real relationship can be established.........Forgiveness in
no way requires that you trust the one you forgive. But should they
finally confess and repent, you will discover a miracle in your own
heart that allows you to reach out and begin to build between you a
bridge of reconciliation.........Forgiveness does not excuse
anything.........You may have to declare your forgiveness a hundred
times the first day and the second day, but the third day will be less
and each day after, until one day you will realize that you have
forgiven completely. And then one day you will pray for his
wholeness......”
―
Wm.
Paul Young,
The Shack:
Where Tragedy Confronts Eternity
One thing is crystal clear:
Life is definitely unfolding according to divine, perfect timing & order.
Even though I was recently lamenting about how, almost one year to the date since my fateful encounter with that Pacific Southwest Speckled Rattlesnake and, here I am continuing to embody the unhealthy imbalances of the wounded masculine and feminine that I was writing and espousing upon then, it's all good. There is an essential piece to my radical wholeness that needed to bee addressed and that was my unhealthy, co-dependent relationship with my parents. I am in the process of actively re-defining our connection while giving them the space and time to cool down from their anger over what I wrote in my first "LoveBook." It wasn't "negative" - I simply felt the need to contextualize why I am so passionate about describing and sharing how to create more love in one's life, even as I intuited that some of my story would hurt them. It wasn't intentional. And, the past is the past. We always have the option to choose a new story, to re-write the old, and to re-create something new. However, radical responsibility for one's actions is an important starting place. As I am beginning to deal with the mess I've made of my financial health and well-bee'ing, I have also felt into the place inside of me where the words, "Everything you touch turns to shit," lodged themselves. From there, I rocked and held my inner child who grew up to perpetuate this fate as an adult. She is feeling much safer now and she is so innocent - of course she forgives! There's nothing else to do.
