(countdown to the beginning of a new world = 9 days)
Come the Gregorian end of 2012, I need a new place to call "hOMe."
I also need a space to root our "Connection Therapy," as well as to write out of.
So, I am remaining open, by not impulsively rushing into any new arrangements - such as formations with others - from a place of scarcity mentality. "It's all unfolding exactly as it is meant to," I keep reminding myself. It's funny how my mind wants to try and play tricks on me. It creeps, like a thief in the night, lurking in the shadows, awaiting a vulnerable moment to jump out and scream its nonsensical fear into my bodymind. This time around, however, I've kept it at bay by keeping my feet moving forward. "I don't need to know how it is all going to happen, I just need to trust that THIS IS IT."
Naturally, life dictates.
On Tuesday night, C. and I 'randomly' bump into each other. Together, we stroll, arm in arm, through San Diego's spiritual enclave and beach town, finally having the 'date' we've been attempting to plan over the course of the past week and a half. She wants to co-create village with me, "you're one adult whom I feel comfortable and safe sharing my family with." A single mother, she has bravely chosen to go against social dictates by raising her two, beautiful children in peace, yet without a steady roof over their heads. I want to work with her, combining her performance art piece with the theatrical story that is currently unveiling itself from my chest. I shared with her my thoughts as she felt a tingling sensation all over her body - a true temperature gauge, and yet another way that the Universe is letting me know that we're on our path.
After a few days spent up in North County, I zigzagged my way from the downtown Santa Fe Depot and up towards our golden hill. The city route I took circuitous, and as I wandered by the Art Center I remembered how I had bumped into one of my old neighbors last Friday. "Come by sometime," he said. Playing the texting game, I stopped into a grocery store to buy him some beer before heading back towards the building that once housed the Hive. On a green light, I stepped off the curb at the exact same moment that the car beside me stepped on the accelerator. My attention alerted, the woman in the passenger seat exclaims, "You almost hit Cara!" Old friends whose thirteen-year-old daughter is giving a school presentation a few blocks away. "Come," they say. "Okay," I chirp, stopping in first on my painter friend in his sweet loft.
Life dictates.
I arrive into the outdoor theatre of Space for Art, where the pre-teens are taking the stage, giving group presentations about a mentor they've interviewed, the questions they asked and the new American flags they designed and created as a result. "Okay, Universe, I am here," my body silently calls out. "What did you need me to experience?" I soak it all in and continue to play the texting game. Soon, another 'date' is luring me back up that hill. I resume a wandering path through East Village - a route I would not have taken had the evening's events not unfurled the way they had. I wander by a venue I didn't know existed - with a coffee shop/lounge area, sliding glass door offices (already housing a bike shop and sound recording studio), prime dance floor space, a large gathering hall and a stage. "Hmmm," my bodymind begins vibrating, after receiving a tour from one of the employees.
Eventually, I return to Las Raices where my sisters sweetly envelop me in their arms. "Yay," they cry out, "you're home." There is nothing sweeter than being loved - "THIS IS IT!" my warm heart beats. We play catchup until another 'date' drops in. Finally, after too many months apart, it's RadSab. We encourage her and Sher to jam, so RadSab drops a fat rhythm across the top of the leather skin of a djembe as we hoot and cheer, and shake some merry makers. 11/11/11's Soular Flare in the Prosperity Hive collectively broke us open. Like a little girl, RadSab turns to her girlfriend and animatedly details some of her experiences from that night last year. Only now, we're just days away from the beginning of our shared destiny when LOVE reigns and harmony flows.
There is no planning here.
No forcing a way.
There is only following a path that has already been written.
Let your feet do the walking.
And your heart do the talking.
Your BodyMind knows.
The Universe Conspires
and LIFE DICTATES.
